The Truth About Overcoming Cravings
There are two things most of us tend to get wrong about cravings.
The first is, we think unless we engage in the behaviour - eating chocolate, smoke a cigaret, scroll our phone, whatever it is - the craving will get stronger and last forever.
The truth, however, is that cravings have a surprisingly short lifespan. The initial wave typically passes within a few minutes. But most of us keep reactivating the craving by continuing to think about the thing we want.
The second thing we get wrong is thinking that we actually want the thing we crave. We don’t. What we really want is freedom from the craving itself.
You see, craving creates a sense of lack in the present moment: “I need this to feel okay.” That sense of lack creates tension and discomfort. When we finally get what we're craving, the tension disappears, and we experience relief.
But the relief isn't necessarily coming from getting what we wanted - it's coming from the craving itself disappearing.
We mistakenly think, “The chocolate made me feel better.” But what actually made us feel better was the fact that we were no longer experiencing the discomfort of wanting the chocolate.
The problem is of course that giving into the craving never gets us the lasting relief and freedom we are seeking. It just keeps us trapped in an endless cycle of wanting.
So next time a craving comes up, try this:
Notice it. Don't fight it or feed it - just feel the raw sensation that’s actually there in your body. It's rarely as intense as it seems. You can bear it quite easily. Just sit with it for a few minutes.
Separate the craving from thoughts. Notice the raw sensation of craving in the body, then notice all the thoughts and mental commentary about the thing you crave. It is the thoughts that keep reactivating the craving.
Let the craving settle. Let go of the thinking, and keep coming back to the sensation itself. By doing this, you’re cutting off the cravings fuel source. Give it a few minutes, and watch it dissipate. If you want, you can imagine a window opening up over your chest and stomach where the sensation can escape.
Reengage with the present. When the sensation has dissipated, reengage with whatever you’re doing in the moment - driving, watching TV, listening to music, chatting to a friend. Don’t keep analysing the craving, just get busy living!
Do this enough times and you discover that the craving can actually dissipate without needing the thing you crave. And on the other side of that craving, is the relief you were looking for all along.
Cravings are like wind-up toys. They shake, dance, jump - then run out of energy. Stop winding them up with more thinking, and they stop on their own!
Disclaimer: This approach is most suitable for everyday cravings, such as cigarettes, junk foods, caffeine, scrolling, gambling or other habitual behaviours. While the principles may also be useful for substance cravings, addictions involving substances such as heroin, methamphetamine or alcohol can involve significant physical and psychological dependence and may require more in depth support. In these cases, this technique should be considered a complementary tool rather than a substitute for appropriate treatment.
Want Support?
Lucas Lindblom is a clinical hypnotherapist with a background in psychology, based in Thornbury, Melbourne. Sessions are available both in person and online. To book, follow the links below.
